Nothing is worse than running into your ex unexpectedly not knowing what to do then accidentally being all awkward and weird. Maybe you hide? Maybe you act over the top trying to impress him? Maybe you make up a bunch of shit to make it sound like things are great? Typically, it doesn’t go exactly as you’d hope.
So here’s the thing,
You’ve got to plan.
You need to know exactly who you want to be in that situation ahead of time.
So that when that situation presents itself, you show up as the confidence bomb badass that you are, not some weirdo who takes over your body and acts like a crazy person.
So here’s what you do:
Decide who your future self is – who is your future self? What does she do? What does she look like? Who does she hang out with? Where does she spend her time? What does she smell like? Where does she shop?
Live from your future self – so now that you know your future self, take small steps daily to live like her. Wake up everyday putting on her costume until it becomes you. Make decisions she would make. Say things she would say. Think thoughts she would think. Take action she would take.
What does your future self do when she runs into her ex? Determine how she would show up in that exact situation. What would she say? What would she do? How would she be feeling?
Most likely she’s feeling confident, it probably doesn’t even phase her that she ran into her ex. It’s like running into an old friend, oh hey! Nice to see you! Hope all is well, right? Whatever it is, outline it all! What is she thinking? How is she feeling? What is she doing?
This will be your outline. So if at any point you run into your ex. You can come back to this. You can come back and say how did my future self show up? What would she do in this situation? How is she feeling? What is she thinking?
Most likely when you first run into him, your heart will flutter, maybe your stomach will migrate to her throat, your face may get hot and/or red. TAKE A DEEP BREATHE.
Come back to yourself, LIVE YOUR FUTURE SELF. She is calm, collected, confident right?
She’s got this, which means you’ve got this.
One of my clients a couple of weeks ago ran into her ex and it didn’t go so great. She found herself trying to be something she wasn’t and not being her amazing self. We walked through this process together and the next time it happened she lived her future self. She was more herself in that situation which made her feel happier and friendlier. Which not only came off attractive to herself but also to others. It was an amazing experience.
Want to walk through it together with me 1:1? Sign up for a free 30 minute mini session where we can tackle this together!
Sending so much love!
Dorothy
