Ladies! I hear you, I totally get it. It’s hard. I know.
But listen, the social media game has brought a whole new situation and environment that changes SO much when you’re going through a breakup. Can you even imagine what it was like for our parents when they went through a breakup? No cell phones, no constant communication. Maybe they got letters? Like in the Notebook? But they literally had no idea what their ex was doing, where they were, if they had a new relationship status. How amazing?!
The thing is, we can do that now too. I’m not saying it’s easy, but seriously, do you feel better after you do it?
Check out the 7 tricks to stop stalking your ex on social media and try them out, NOW.
Remember how you felt the last time you stalked his page – take a moment, breathe in, breathe out. Write down exactly how you felt the last time you checked his social media. Where is that feeling in your body? What color is it? Is it hard, is it soft? Do you want to generate that feeling again?
Think about what your future and best self would do – is this something she even thinks about? What is she doing instead? Form a habit of asking yourself this and then going and doing what your future self would do instead of stalking your ex.
Complete 100 urges – make a list in your phone every time you have an urge to stalk him but don’t. Write down the date and time and why you had an urge to stalk him and why you decided against it.
Incentivize good behavior – When you complete your 100 urges meaning you’ve had 100 urges that weren’t fulfilled or given into, celebrate! Determine ahead of time how you’ll celebrate once you’ve had 100 urgers of checking his social media but don’t. Another fun one you could try is a “Stalk Jar” like a swear jar. Every time you give into the urge to stalk your ex, you put 10 dollars into the jar. Determine ahead of time where that money is going to go (maybe a charity that you don’t really like, or to a friend, something that you’re not totally excited to give your money to).
Relax have compassion for yourself – with that being said, when you do give into an urge don’t spend additional time beating yourself up over it. Your future self doesn’t do that, she has compassion for herself, she learns and then moves the fuck on.
Accountability from friends #toughlove – find a friend who can hold you accountable. At one point, I had my friend go in and change my password to all my social media accounts so I couldn’t get in for a week when I had a huge project at work. You could do that or something less drastic is just messaging them when you feel like stalking your ex so you have their support.
DETOX – sometimes, you just need a detox all together. If you feel like nothing else is working, block the ex, delete the apps, put settings on your browsers to be restricted from certain sites and call it a day. Detoxes are refreshing AF, think about how light you’ll feel?!
Having trouble implementing these steps into your life, or you feel like you’ve already tried it all? Let’s hop on a free mini coaching session and we will figure out what’s keeping you from doing what you say you’re going to do.
With love and positive vibes,
Dorothy
