Let’s face it, being “present” during the holidays is already a struggle when you’re running around trying to get shit done, meeting up with friends. Between the holiday parties, family events, and gift wrapping it can be difficult to slow down and ENJOY this time of year. Then, if you add a breakup on top of it all you also may be just shoving your pain and emotions down to tend to them in the new year. It adds a thin layer of “meh” in your mind that makes you think, “keeping busy” is a good thing. It’s something you’ll tend to in the New Year.
I want to offer you a different perspective.
What if, instead of ignoring the painful stuff that’s coming up for you during this time, address it, head on? Not only be present with that pain but be present with everything else going on during this holiday season.
Because you know what? It’s the most wonderful time of the year.
Why Should I Be Present During a Holiday Breakup?
Simple. The sooner you address the root of your pain and take responsibility for the way you’re feeling, the sooner you’re going to be over your ex, feelin great, not buffering, and living your best life.
When you’re avoiding the way you feel you begin to buffer. I’ve buffered in my life with a number of things, over eating, social media, cleaning, drinking, work, all kinds of things. When you’re buffering all you’re really doing is trying to avoid a feeling.
When you buffer in life you end up with a bunch of net negative results in your life, such as weight gain, exhaustion, inaction, and shitty negative thought cycles. This is all created with thoughts.
Your thoughts are optional.
Which means you can have two very different experiences if you decide to tend to the pain and become very present with not only your breakup but also all the wonderful things the holiday brings!
How to Be Present During a Holiday Breakup:
Step 1: Take Time to Meditate
There is nothing else as mindful as going inward to find strength and happiness. Meditation not only makes you feel better but it also strengthens your bond with yourself. Which you desperately need right now. Be your own best friend, no one else knows what you truly need except the soul sitting within your human body. Tap into her knowledge, she knows you best.
Don’t know how to meditate? Get your free meditation guide here.
Step 2: Process Your Pain
I talk about this a lot but it’s at the root of every breakup. Learning that you’re the one creating the pain for yourself is literally the most life changing work you can do. Once you identify this way you take back all the power and get to generate any feeling you want to on purpose to drive real results in your life.
Check out the blog on processing your pain here.
Step 3: Set an Intention
An intention is like a mantra that you can use to remind yourself how do you want to think, feel, and act in the present moment. What matters most to you and incorporate that into your intention.
Here are some holiday intentions I use:
I love being with family during the holidays
I’m so grateful for these moments
Remember to love the process, it’s not always about the end result
I’m living my future self
I’m a bombass business woman paving a new path, I’m the only one with the answer
These are the moments I live for
There is beauty and a lesson in every circumstance
My family is what is important to me
Step 4: Physically Write Down 3 Things You’re Grateful For Everyday
Seriously, find joy in all the little things. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in “the business” which by the way is only a concept. If you think “you’re busy” recognize what thought is causing that for you because you saying you’re busy is just you having busy thoughts. Many people think I’m a “busy” person but I gave up responding to people with the word “busy” this year, and I LOVE IT!
If you can feel grateful for the little things, and start your day off this way, you’ll be teaching yourself to be grateful for the things you have yet to receive from the universe. And that my friend, is raising your vibration to meet that of the vortex, the vortex that is filled with your dreams, goals, and ambitions.
Step 5: DO MODELS
If you don’t know what a model is, check out the “Let’s Work the Model” worksheet!
Become aware of the thoughts that are cluttering your mind and identify how you want to feel during the holidays. Just becoming aware will open up the possibilities to becoming present in the moment but understanding what is causing you to feel a specific emotion.
Alright my friends, sending so much love this holiday season. I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and has a Happy New Year!
